6 Months Later...

People have often asked me how life has been since I got back to the states from Albania. Has there been a lot of culture shock? Was it hard to re-adjust? What was the most difficult part of re-acclimating to life in the USA? Now that I have a bit of time back here, I find that I can answer this question a little bit better.

Has there been a lot of culture shock?
Hmmm... well, not as much as I thought there would have been. Actually, I have found it more shocking that not much has changed since I have returned. Surprise, surprise! Life still went on without me. Lol. That shouldn't be a surprise, yet it is. Ha! Aside from my ego-check, I suppose there have been a few interesting things to note.

1. Everything seems to move at a very fast pace.
2. People you meet are not as easy going and welcoming. The "stranger danger" is alive and well.
3. There are way too many food options in the supermarket! lol Really, who needs 67 different cereal options?!

Was it hard to re-adjust?
Yes, and here's why. I got used to the community culture I enjoyed in Albania. People there do not let you sit alone. They ask you out to coffee, invite you to parties, and welcome you into their homes on a regular basis. New Jersey seems to be quite different and it has been a challenge to find friends and such to hang out with. That wasn't something I expected, yet after living here a while, I am seeing that this seems to be one of the hardest things to adjust to since I have returned. People don't seem to have time to just sit and chat.

What was the most difficult part of re-acclimating to life in the USA?

Again, it wasn't necessarily an issue of re-adjusting to "American Culture" so much as missing the friends I had made in Albania, both Albanians and Peace Corps volunteers alike. I must admit, I didn't know how attached I had grown being out there. Now I feel it. I miss it. I miss my friends. I miss my life in Librazhd. I miss my buddies in Tirana. I miss my good friends who are now making a home in Thailand.

New adventures... and a new BLOG!

Good friends are hard to find...

I was initially thinking to continue this blog as there seems to be a good number of followers. I thought again and decided that I wanted to keep this blog solely for my Peace Corps days in Albania. I have a couple more posts that I plan to write in reflection of the amazing experience I have had in Albania over the last 26 months of my life.

But the adventure doesn't end here... if you'd like to see where I go next, visit me at:

https://jonbreen.wordpress.com/

Breast Cancer Village Outreach

As my time in Albania comes to a close, my counterpart and I have officially wrapped up our Breast Cancer outreach grant project! I am happy to report that we have exceed our goal of reaching out to 300 women in village areas by more than 200! Below is a summary of our activities and some of the issues we faced in administering the campaign. (With photos, of course!)

BREAST CANCER VILLAGE OUTREACH - A PEACE CORPS PCPP GRANT PROJECT

 Participants practicing detection with breast model

Breast Cancer continues to be an issue in Albania, particularly in regions where information is limited. Geographic barriers and isolation of rural village areas in the Librazhd Region of Eastern Albania have caused a dangerous lack of education leading to deaths due to breast cancer. My counterpart and I decided to take on this issue in our community for both professional and personal reasons. As the de facto supervisors for all the local health centers, we decided to utilize them as leverage for this project, both to actively help with gathering women and to create a network to better do outreach to the entire community. There are 77 villages in Librazhd Region across 11 Komuna. Over 85% of the population under DShP Librazhd jurisdiction live outside of Librazhd City. That is why we chose these remote areas as our areas of focus. These villages, some hours away in the mountains represent some of the most impoverished communities in Albania, and Europe by extension.

Me presenting with a nurse from our partnering health center. Speaking in Shqip (Albanian) was quite a challenge at first!

Goals Achieved - We successfully held seminars in all 11 komuna, an achievement never before seen in the region. We reached out to more than 500 women across these areas and even held two additional sessions as well as a Training-of-Trainers with all the nurses in the area. By the end of the grant period, my counterpart had contacts both at the health centers but also through the schools in every area of the county. We have essentially built a better network of outreach that can be used for future health campaigns. Also, my counterpart has learned valuable skills in project design and management that will allow him to access future project funds. 

By collaborating with local nurses, we were able to more-effectively reach out to women and build a greater health network.

We initially planned to hold formal seminars in each region, by working closely with local community members across the 11 komuna. We had to change gears a bit as it was extremely challenging to schedule these sessions, and, due to the spread out nature of the village areas, the isolation of certain communities, reluctance from local health staff and the changing weather all made formal sessions a practical impossibility in some areas. We therefore changed our strategy and instead did a few smaller presentations, one at the health center and another at the local school with teachers. To further our reach we sometimes went with a local trusted community member and walked the streets to greet women and visit their homes to share this information. This strategy made it easier for our local partners to schedule our visits as it put less pressure on them to organize women. 

This truly was a collaborative effort. We couldn't have done this project without our local partners - even the cafe owners!

The overall community feeling has been positive and we have found that most people are very receptive to gaining information for themselves and the women in their lives. We even encountered many men who were so worried about the health of their family and friends that they demanded we give them information for the women in their lives! 

Many have heard about breast cancer but were too afraid to learn more or even perform a proper self-examination for fear of detection. For these people, detection meant death. We acknowledged their worries and catered our outreach appropriately, addressing such concerns in our presentations. We reassured them that this disease is treatable, especially when detected early. That is why it is so important to learn as much as you can about risk factors, symptoms and proper exams (self-exams and mammography, based on age) 

A community partner demonstrating detection methods with local women in her community.

Capacity and Skills Built

My counterpart had developed many skills throughout this project, as well as in the project planning period. We met and together did a community assessment, looking at all aspects of life in Librazhd, particularly relating to health needs, services offered and places for intervention. After such discussions we did a brainstorming session to come up with ideas for a viable community project. We then attended a Project Design & Management workshop together and my counterpart had the opportunity to learn a lot regarding project planning, design, evaluation as well as the grants process. We co-wrote the grant application, worked together on each outreach session, and compiled all the information and prepared the grant report together. 

Women came from nearby villages to attend the seminar and bring back info to their families and communities.

My counterpart has gained valuable skills that increase his capacity in his current position, as well as develop himself professionally. Through our collaboration with local health professionals across the region, many had the opportunity to practice their presentation of information regarding Breast Cancer - some doing so for the first time. This will allow them to feel more comfortable doing similar work in the future, and have more impact through such engagements.

Sometimes humor is the best way to start addressing a serious and uncomfortable topic.

 

Sustainability

Through the successful collaboration across the 11 districts, we have achieved our goal of building a sustainable network of professionals (both local health center nurses as well as school directors). My counterpart can now utilize this network for future health campaigns.

Through the training of trainers for all komuna nurses as well as their re-engagement during the local health outreach sessions, we have prepared them with information they need to continue to reach out on our behalf. Many nurses agreed to continue to speak to all their community members about Breast cancer to make sure everyone in their regions has access to this information. We gave each nurse as many additional brochures as they thought they might use in the future. Thus the impact of these efforts will continue past the initial grant period, and possibly for much longer.

Unexpected Events

My counterpart and local partner walking the muddy mountain roads to outreach to extremely isolated communities.

As stated previously, we did not expect the seminars to be so hard to plan. We faced many issues in trying to plan large-scale sessions in remote areas where we are unknown, and where we know very little about the community layout and habits. We had to do mini-community assessments, including a daily calendar to identify the appropriate times to visit these areas. Many nurses were not able to gather many community members, thus we had to be creative and reach out ourselves once we got to these sites. 

Our community partner demonstrating a self-exam for our participants.

 

We recommend that the portable Mammography machine come back to Librazhd several more times, allowing more people to get a mammography, particularly poorer women. There is a great need across the region, and attention should be made to focus on rural areas, isolated mountain communities and poor women.

Lessons Learned

We learned that although women are aware of breast cancer, they are often believe it to be a death sentence, and thus do not seek out services nor perform self-exams. This is putting many women at risk of not detecting a malignant mass in time. Risk is further exacerbated by a harsher living conditions - including extreme isolation, lack of power, lack of cell phone reception, lack of internet access and very poorly-funded health centers. Since we can’t go to every woman in the community individually, we should work with those who have access to them. This proved extremely effective for this project, as these small communities are very tight-knit and they are very willing to share this information. It is about helping each other, and the community by extension, survive.

When geographic barriers existed, we did what we could to meet women where it was more convenient. Sometimes at work!

 

We found that, in full Albanian tradition, many agreement and work is done over coffee. We had many informal discussions with our potential partners before each session to build trust and to understand and assuage any concerns they may have. This was also our way of doing a community assessment. They know their community best, and we were able to leverage that simply though chatting before our engagement. Now that my counterpart has all these contacts at his disposal, he can increase his capacity for additional engagements. 

From Albania Days to Scarlet Knights

30 days left in Albania. 30 days! Crazy! The full impact of this still hasn't hit me yet, but it does come in waves. With two grant projects closing this week I am feeling a sense of relief and accomplishment. As things wind down here in the land of the eagles, I am beginning to set my sights on the future. Speaking of which... Where AM I going? What will I be doing?

Well, I may not know the future (okay, I definitely DON'T know the future) but I do have some viable prospects. So what am I doing? After a brief stay in San Francisco with my parents, I am planning to begin the next stage of my life on the East Coast. Namely - New Jersey (aka "The Garden State"). I was actually born rather close-by on Long Island, New York, but my family moved to San Francisco when I was too young to remember anything about the place. Thus this will be my chance to really see what life is like out there. Having been a west-coaster most of my life (except for the last two years in Albania...) this will be an experience.

I have decided to accept a position with Rutgers University in the Global Health Program. Quite an exciting opportunity! I will be working with nursing students to incorporate global health perspectives into their existing curriculum. There are many components in this new position, and a few are still being developed, thus I will have more details on this later. Needless to say, I am relieved to be gainfully employed yet again and helping with such an innovative initiative. One of the great perks of this position will be that I get to live near my brother and his family. I will also not be too far from many other relatives.

Marshallah and village living - 6 things I will miss about Albania

Marshallah! Shume bukur...

My COS (Close of Service) date is set, and I just bought my airplane ticket back to the US. My last day in Albania will be May 18th, 2016. It felt strange to actually click the purchase button and confirm the ticket. As if not buying a ticket means that I would stay here indefinitely! The thought had crossed my mind. I even held off pushing that button until the last possible date... Does that mean something?

I will be spending a few days in Istanbul, Turkey before heading back to San Francisco, and then... well, that will have to wait until my next post. Needless to say I do have some tentative plans and rather exciting prospects. I felt that I could use a few days to reflect on this tremendous experience I have had here. The eventuality of my departure doesn't feel real yet.

That time I was a regular on an Albania fitness TV show!

I have been living in Albania for more than two years now. I feel relatively confident in speaking with people in Albanian. I have gotten over the aversion of the impromptu coffee with strangers and fully embrace a spur-of-the-moment circle dance. Yes, Albania has grown on me and I am going to miss this life; the picturesque environment, byrek and pilaf, as well as speaking Albanian with people everywhere I go. I will certainly miss my good friends Steve and Megi, my Tirana buddies (you know who you are!) and my fellow PCVs. Here are a few additional things I will particularly miss:

Circle dancing the night away!

1. Life in Librazhd (my site of service) - Guys shouting 'hello' to me in countless variations of slang, dialect, cursing and English as I walk down the main street in town. Yes, I shall miss my life as a 'katunar' (Albanian for 'villager'). Walking beside donkeys, the call to prayer sounding from the Mosque, waking up to the rooster's crow, and grandmas wishing me 'Marshallah' when I get back from the gym. Ahh Librazhdi!

Celebrating and dressing up with smiles

As a city-dweller for most of my life, this has been something new for me - people actually noticing where I'm going, asking about my day, inviting me to coffee, and chatting with me on a regular basis. It felt a bit strange at first, but I began to feel a sense of connection from these actions. Now I know I will miss it. Especially my close Albanian friends and my host family.

My Albanian Family

2. The burgeoning art scene of Albania - Although artistry is not anything new to Albania, many foreigners are not familiar with the entirety of artistic expression in Albania. After all, art can be highly controversial. In these post-communist days, you can discover musicians, dancers, painters, sculptors, writers, performance artists, architects, and even those with renowned skills with mosaics right here in Albania. You just have to know where to look. ;-)

Albanian punk rock band 'PMS' (yes that's the name! lol)

3. The activist community of Albania - I have met some of the most amazing, brave activists during my service here. In such a short period of time, they have helped transform the landscape of LGBT society in Albania. I even had the opportunity to partner with some of them to raise awareness of LGBT issues and human rights in regions across the country through a grant project. I will also miss some wonderful Allies who, despite potential implication, are willing to place justice and equality over personal discomfort.

Activists paving the way for a better world

4. My fellow PCVs - I've met some great friends among Peace Corps volunteers and will surely stay in touch with many of them for years to come. We travel together, call each other in times of joy and times of sorrow, work on amazing projects together, support each other through illnesses, injury and other unexpected events... and of course, we share tales of such adventures every time we meet.

Peace Corps Albania Group 17

5. Visiting rural village areas - Through the breast cancer outreach project, I have had the opportunity to call the distant rural villages of eastern Albania my 'office.' Getting to work with women in isolated areas to raise awareness of health issues has really been a joy. Partnering with my counterpart at the public health directorate, we've made connections across the region, bringing health professionals together for the first time ever. I'm definitely going to miss this!

Reaching out where information is needed the most

6. Kampi Pa Emer Summer Camp

No 'best of Albania' list would be complete without mentioning Camp No Name! It has really been an honor and a privilege to be a part of this annual summer camp in Librazhd that provides so much more than a week of fun and games. It is about inclusion, understanding, love and friendship. It is also about living a healthy life full of possibilities and achieving great things through cooperation. With growing numbers, this camp has planted seeds in the lives of countless Roma and non-Roma Albanian youth in Librazhd, the results of which are already visible in the togetherness of these kids (who are now young adults!). This was also the first time I got to be a camp counselor after going to summer camp every year as a kid. It was a great experience working with Albanians and other fellow PCVs and I will miss this a lot. I'm looking forward to seeing visionaries Alba and Joey (the founders of this initiative) when I get back to the US!

Counselor Pyramid!

Very serious moment

We're all smiles here at Kampi Pa Emer!

Dental care is always in fashion!

 

I'm Coming Home!

Partying it up on my 34th birthday, wearing the official group 17 shirt and new qeleshe hat (gift from my friend Arbi)

It's official! My last day as a Peace Corps Volunteer here in Albania will be May 18th, 2016.

I will be returning to the United States (after a few short excursions) in late May, 2016. After all, if you were living in Europe, wouldn't you visit another country for the price of a domestic trip within the US? Although money is getting quite tight (read: extremely tight) after having lived off of bare minimum Peace Corps "wages," I think it worth it to visit a few capital cities before I head back. I'm thinking Istanbul,  Athens, & Reykjavik.

One of my Albanian friends in Librazhd

Also, after careful consideration, I have decided to move to the Washington, DC area for the next phase of my life. Although I've considered San Francisco/Bay Area/San Jose my home for most of my life, I feel that at this point I'd very much like to spend more time with my east-coast family (brother's family, aunts, uncles and cousins). I will also be starting my journey to become a Psychiatric Nurse. That means returning to school after a 11 year break (since graduating from UC Berkeley). I'm very excited to start on the path towards nursing practice, after all these years! I will have a nice chunk of time visiting my home base in SF/Bay Area, from late May through June. I'm looking forward to having many coffees and catching up with friends and family during this time - oh, and finding work and a place to live. lol

My home for the last two years

I still have about two and a half months left in my service and I still have two grants outstanding (Breast Cancer Rural Outreach, and LGBT Community Outreach). I have to finish and report out for both of these projects by mid-April. Doable, but not without its share of hustle. Hustle hustle hustle. It's not a bad thing. Quite the opposite. I appreciate the ability to do such work here in Albania. Both projects are nearing completion, so that's encouraging. So far, through these projects...

At least 186 women living in isolated, rural areas of eastern Albania have received education on Breast Cancer - have gained knowledge on how to do a self-exam and can identify signs, symptoms, and risk factors. 

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More than 150 students and community members in communities across Albania have gained awareness and deeper understanding regarding the LGBT civil rights movement in Albania, and have had a chance to ask questions, engage in critical thinking, and interact with an LGBT person (many for the first time).

Zumba: An Unlikely Peace Corps Project

What's that noise echoing around town? It's ZUMBAAAA!

Before I joined Peace Corps I had a vision of what my life would be like. -  I would live in a mud hut. I wouldn't have running water. I would be living in an isolated, sparsely-populated village where wifi access wouldn't definitely not be an option. With that in mind, I thought that my projects might include building an electricity grid, setting up a water system or even helping out at the local hospital with basic triage. I didn't imagine that I would be leading a class... for Zumba! But I am surely glad that I am.

What started off as an idea from some brief conversations with local youth and some support from friends back home, slowly turned into a regular group that has been meeting for over a year now. We are a rather small group, yet consistent. No less than 4, no more than 8. Through this class I am noticing several things. First, the girls feel comfortable around me. This took a bit of time. In the beginning, I noticed that there was a good mix of boys and girls. Once the boys realized that they would have to use their hips, they quickly got embarrased and would sit down and just watch. I could see that they wanted to participate, as they would get up for another song and dance again, only to sit back down when any hip action made its way into the routine. I asked why they weren't willing to try the routines, they said that they simply don't have hips. "Only girls have hips." to which I replied "Really? Well, I wonder what all those football players use to kick the ball, then." They were still not convinced. But it was of no concern to me. If the girls want to continue, I would be there.

We insist on having fun!

Zumba is not something that many people have a chance to do here in Albania, yet it is accessible for those with the motivation. We use Youtube videos to learn routines, practicing with videos projected on the wall. We simply follow along. We learn together (and make mistakes together). It's not about being perfect, it is about having fun, exercising, and doing something positive together.

We use music from several influences - latin (salsa, merengue, tango, reggaeton & cumbia), latin pop, hip-hop, pop, middle-eastern influence, and more). I like to pick videos that use people of different ethnicities, ages, body types, using both men and women. As the students learn with these diverse people through their videos, they get to share a sort-of bond with people of all backgrounds.

Gummi time at Kampi Pa Emer (summer camp)!

After 9 months of dancing with these youth, they asked me if I could teach the younger kids to dance. They also volunteered to help teach the classes with me! I didn't realize at the time, but this might just turn into something sustainable. Again, I don't teach the classes so much as learn the routines alongside them. Thus they are just as skilled as I am. The little kids Zumba has really taken off, bringing up to 25 kids at a time. Imagine for a moment the 25 little kids ages 4 - 10 wiggling to "Uptown Funk" or shaking to Moves Like Jagger. Adorable! They love to move, dance, and just act silly. Some of these kids have very little at home and really take to activities like this that let them just be kids. This has only been possible with the help and coordination of the older kids. Thus real community impact is starting to happen.

Me with an adorable lil Zumba princess

As of yet, we just make due with what clothes we have, but I would love to see some actual workout t-shirts or fun arm-bands, hip bands or something to make it more "Zumba-ey." Maybe a magic donor will arrive one day... Who knows? Maybe a flash mob in front of the Municipality will actually happen come spring time. :-) Yeah, this is Peace Corps. And yes, it is pretty frickin' awesome.

Breaking the Ice

Winter is Persimmon season!

With temperatures hovering near freezing, life out here in Librazhd seems to be slowing down. It's like we are all preparing to hibernate. No one is scheduling any new activities for the rest of the year. It is a sort-of domino effect. If one person is out, then others hold off their planning and meetings until they return. This causes everyone else to put things on lockdown for the time being. Integration in Peace Corps is all about adjusting to your environment. When people say 'wait,' you wait. That being said, there is still much that can be done until the complete holiday shutdown. In fact, this has actually been a productive week. With two active grants, I am quite pleased to see things moving along. One grant for LGBT outreach and another for Breast Cancer.

University students posed for a group photo with presenters from Peace Corps and ProLGBT

The LGBT Outreach project has been progressing splendidly. Our outreach team (the "pink posse") held its third outreach session in the Southern sea-side town of Saranda. Response from the University level audience was primarily positive. A couple participants had an issue with acceptance of LGBT people, but it made for some good discussion. Despite some differing opinions, all participants were respectful and gave us their full attention throughout the session. I feel like if we allow people to ask the questions they need to ask in order to understand what being LGBT is like, then they might be more willing to change their pre-existing beliefs. If we can leave the audience with a good impression of us, it may help improve their overall opinion of LGBT in general. I believe that face-to-face interaction in very important. If you can like just one LGBT person, you will be so much more likely to be open to others. So far, we are seeing some mostly-positive reactions.

Students presenting on HIV

My counterpart and I held a session on HIV/AIDS with 8th and 9th graders at town about 30 minutes down the road. They actually knew many facts about this subject, which was a great surprise. This was through our work with the Directorate of Public Health in Librazhd (which essentially oversees Public Health outreach throughout the region - roughly 87,000 individuals.) We are trying to get out of the city of Librazhd and bring our lessons to more areas of need. Of course this is quite a challenge, as funding for such efforts is not always available. It is a mystery, but a reality - how can a community promotions department operate with a budget of 0? Usually my counterpart and I will end up paying for our work travel ourselves (which is rather silly, as neither of us is earning very much at all.)  We got a grant to fund our expense for the Breast Cancer project, but we are still left to our own devices for all other health lessons and outreach. If dipping into our wages can help us do our jobs more effectively, then it's just something that needs to be done. I do wonder what will happen when I eventually leave my position here. I hope my counterpart will find a sustainable way to keep on doing this good work.

Middle School students wore red ribbons to raise awareness about HIV/AIDS in a small town in Eastern Albania

Through my PCPP project my counterpart and I will be holding our second workshop in the isolated village of Stravaj, educating women about Breast Cancer. Planning these sessions are quite a challenge, as we must take much into consideration: weather (snow), transportation (it takes about 2 hours to get to these remote mountain villages) and potential for event participation (the day/time/weather all need to be right for them to show up). Once it snows, all bets are off and we must wait until the thaw to hold our sessions. In many developed areas, this might not be an issues, as people have cars and can drive and meet us there. Our project primarily targets some of the poorest areas of Albania, and in Europe by extension. These are places with internet, power, and cell phone access. Let's hope the weather holds up!

Let the Holidays Begin!

Thanksgiving means family time

The Holidays were kicked off with a wonderful Thanksgiving dinner here in Librazhd, celebrated with fellow Peace Corps Volunteers and local Albanians. After all, Peace Corps Goal II is to share American Culture with 'host country nationals' (aka the 'locals'). We made our favorite dishes, including sweet potato pie, pumpkin pie, green bean casserole, stuffing and cranberry sauce. I made my not-so-famous but oh-so-yummy breaded cauliflower. :-)

My sitemate's colleagues trying out our T-Day cuisine. :-)

We even went around the room and each said what we were grateful for. Every single Albanian even participated. It was great! Plus, it seemed that they appreciated being included in this celebration. That is oh so Peace Corps. We are representatives of America, and in sharing our culture we are acting (albeit on a local level) as ambassadors. We learn the language, live with the families, work with the locals and even celebrate alongside them. That is something that Peace Corps really fosters through its structure - making individual and small group connections that can be so incredibly meaningful. Many people we encounter have never met an American in person. We therefore must be a little more open, a little more understanding, and that much more cognizant of our actions. We are representatives from our country, here to help and have a cultural exchange. Sometime that means one simply must put on their dancing shoes and party! (Albanian style of course)

Kids in Traditional Albanian outfits from the Librazhd Region

I recently went to a couple Albanian cultural performances in my community here. It was really nice to see local Albanians performing these traditional dances and songs, and reciting culturally-significant literature. I finally got to see the dance of my community - the Valle Rajcë with people dressed in local garb. Traditionally the Albanians in the Librazhd region were known as the 'çorape te kuq' which translates to 'the red socks' (something much loved by my friends from Boston).

With two of the most awesome boys in Albania and their families!

Both performances were packed. Every seat in the local Cultural Center was taken and people were even standing on the wings just to watch (including myself). I heard from a friend that two kids we knew were going to perform, so I thought I'd go and show my support. It was great! All the performances were done by students in the local schools. I was thoroughly impressed. What was even better was the fact that the kids in the audience showed appreciation for their peers' performances. Something I really like to see. The celebrations were to commemorate the Independence of Albania first celebrated on Nov. 28, 1912.

See the red socks? That's regional Librazhd dress.

Girls singing traditional Albanian anthems

The Land of Chillaxin' Eagles

Librazhd, Albania - My Home

As a foreigner coming from a metropolitan area of the United States, I am used to a fast-paced, 'productive' life. It has been a challenge for me to adjust to life out here in Eastern Albania. People in my community often remind me "Avash! Avash!" (Turkish for 'slowly, slowly') - an oft-used expression here in Albania. This is not a place where one grabs a Jamba Juice, heads to the gym for a quick circuit routine, does cardio while watching the news, and picks up a Chicken Bowl at Chipotle on their way home to catch up on work on the weekend. No. This is a place where one might go from having coffee with friends for an hour or two, to lunch with family, back out for more coffee with different friends until the early afternoon, back home for a nap, out for an evening stroll, another coffee, and then home late at night for dinner.

As one might suspect, this is a very community-oriented society. It is seen as rather abnormal to stay by one's self all day and to do things alone. Americans call this independence. Albanians call it 'turp' (shame). It appears that if one is not connected with family or friends, it is not seen as bad, but rather sad. In America it does not seen as tragic, as we often stay connected through multiple interactions throughout the day (Facebook, e-mail, phone calls, coffee break at work, drinks at happy hour, and dinner with family/friends at home.)

I joined Peace Corps expecting to get away from the land of multi-tasking. I wanted simplicity in my life. And that's just what I got! But where you go, there you are. I feel like that mentality is starting to grow here in the land where you may not always have running water, but you will most likely always have WiFi.

One can easily sense the speed of things here. For example, when you go to a restaurant or cafe, usually you will be greeted by the waiter who will take your order(s). After the drinks have arrived, you might not see the waiter again for hours upon end. This is completely normal here. They will not pressure you to leave nor harass you into paying promptly after finishing your beverages or meal. They will leave you to your company for an indefinite amount of time. If you'd like to pay fast and leave, you will most likely have to take initiative and call for the waiter to come give the bill. It is not because the waitstaff are slow, it is because they are considerate.

Maybe it's the hundreds of years of isolation. Maybe it's the proud cultural traditions of the Albanian people. In any case, one must take note and adjust accordingly.

Belgrade Pride: On My Way Home...

Belgrade Pride 2015

Belgrade Pride is over and I am on my way back to my site in Albania with a short stop in the capital. I can't help but wonder how my local community will react to my participation in this event. I have been posting a lot of photos, videos and news articles on Facebook lately about Belgrade Pride. I have also been quoted by the AP and AFP, so my name is starting to float all around the web for this event. There are also countless photos and videos of pretty much everyone there captured by hundreds of journalists in attendance. This was indeed a mass media event! I am hoping that I don't come home to villagers with pitchforks ready to drive the gay American out. It may be laughable, but it is a concern. The danger may not always be around, but it is REAL. Gossip spreads really fast here, and one step over the line can cost a volunteer his site.

I'm hoping all this coverage will reach the Serbian general population (in an appropriate way.) One never knows the angle a reporter will take. Depending on the hot topic du jour, one could place this event in a positive way or in a potentially harmful way. That is the power of the media - the former angle fostering harmony, the latter creating division.

'Operation Closet Door' (Here's where the fun begins!)

So I decided to come out to my best friend in my site. I had been wanting to do so for a long time now. I felt it necessary to be more open and honest with close friends. I would, of course, love to be more open and honest with my entire community, but I am not sure how that would roll out. For now, I am starting with my friends.

I was happy to find that it was not an issue for him. In fact, he half-suspected already and was very supportive. I hadn't stated it specifically, but I'm sure he could tell for various reasons. I was so relieved! I really can't articulate the feeling of having that conversation go well. It feels amazing.

At a certain point in my service, I was becoming frustrated at the lack of close friends I had at site. By close friends, I mean those who would not treat me poorly once they found out about my orientation. It is hard for me to invest time in a relationship knowing that there is a possibility that the other person would end up hating me. Would you? I have to make friends to integrate, and so I did. But, there was always that secret. I didn't feel like they would be anything more than acquaintances. It is nice to have those folks who I can say 'hi' to everyday on my way down the main street in town. Some of these acquaintances can turn into interesting friendships (gym buddies, people to chat and have coffee with, colleagues, etc). Others don't go much further than the following conversation. Note: The word 'Cune' (pronounced "Ch-oon") is a young male:

Me: 'C'kemi?'(what's up?)
Cune: 'Xhoni! O daku! C'kemi?' (Jon! Oh, dude! What's up?)
Me: Hiq ('nothing')
Cune: Hey, you like Albanian girls? (in English)
Me: Ummm... Sure. I guess.
Cune: They are hotter than American girls? (in English)
Me: They do have very nice hair...
Cune: Maybe you will get married to an Albanian girl one day!
Me: Po.... hahahahaha.... Ah k'shu (Yes, haha, well then...)
*Cough*
(Awkward pause)
Cune: Mire, shihemi me vone! (Good, see you later!)
Me: Shihemi. Pacim! (See you! Bye!)

End scene

I feel like interactions like this make it harder to connect. Talking about women, sex, and drugs is often seen as a way the Albanian guys try to connect with us male American volunteers. I seems like they think we love to talk about girls and drugs all the time, and so they start off like that. I do see potential here for deeper understanding, but honestly I'm not sure how much time that would take. It can be challenging to strike up a meaningful conversation in passing (for both sides). Of course, not all guys are like this. The above conversation merely represents a group of conversations and interactions I've had since coming to Albania. There are countless amazing young men in Albania. One must always acknowledge that, while discussing such things.

That being said, I have seen that when guys are in a group, they tend to speak in this way. They tend to joke a lot more, speak more bluntly, and talk about this kind of subject matter. When alone, it seems that they open up more about themselves and are a bit easier to engage with. Maybe that's a global phenomenon!

Peace Corps was initially a bit scared when I spoke about 'coming out' in my community. They reminded me of the option to evacuate should I require assistance. haha... Although it scared me a bit at first, later I felt comforted by such words. After all, nobody really knows what the reactions might be. This is a post-communist, highly traditional, primarily Islamic country. But once I get past all that, I see hope. I see possibility. I see the vision of Albanian LGBT society living openly and in the light of their communities. I see that future for them, and for me.

I decided that I need to try to come out to my community. I have named this self-imposed assignment  "Operation Closet Door." :-) So far, so good. I haven't encountered any drama, violence, threats, or harassment... yet. It is not easy opening up this topic in a place where such things are never discussed. I feel it my duty as an LGBT activist to have those awkward conversations, and open the door to Albanians who live here. They might not feel comfortable being the first to talk about such things. I also feel it my duty as an American to help. Somebody has to! As Peace Corps has so kindly reminded me - I have the protection of the American Government on my side. If I can use that privilege to help closeted LGBT men and women living here, then that's precisely what I plan to do.